Thank you for this wonderfully thoughtful response, James! Ahhh, you've lived such an amazing life. I am deeply inspired by you.

I especially love this: "If I wanted to lead any kind of a life of love and dignity, I had to be a complete rebel. I couldn't accept almost anything.

"That was very difficult when I was a young man. I wish things hadn't been like that, because it was pretty traumatizing. But then it was over, and I had broken through, and I was okay.

"I was forced to do the work, and I was so glad of it."

I think this is part of the reason why queer spaces feel so fully authentic, so joyfully, radically accepting and loving. If you can break through this world's bullshit to loving yourself, you can find true freedom.

Coasting through life letting people assume I'm straight and cisgender has been far too easy. Even though I've always been outspoken in my social circles, with the Public At Large, I've taken advantage of the fact that I present as perfectly heteronormative. I know that that's held me back in a lot of ways.

I also know that one of the answers to my dilemma is to spend more time in queer spaces, so I'm posting this here as a reminder to myself that there are things I can do right now to stop hiding.

Thank you for reading and for rooting for me, James. :) It means a lot.