You can be committed to caring for and being there for someone in times of need without being committed to tying your entire lives together in the manner of primary partners. There are varying levels of commitment — if you read my paragraph about what I was willing to commit to in a relationship at the time I wrote this piece, you’ll see it includes commitments to honesty, transparency, reliability, communication, care, and accountability. I know plenty of monogamous= couples who don’t have any of those qualities as features of their relationship.

And aaaaalso — I’m now married (!!!) to the most wonderful life partner in the universe, and I was very much in the mindset of this essay when he and I first met. :) And he didn’t walk away. Everything I posted here about being open to a deeper commitment and primary relationship developing organically with the right person proved to be 100% true.